My Dear Newborn Son,

To say that I love you more than I have ever loved anyone is both clichéd and an understatement. It’s not just that I have never felt this much love for someone before, it’s that the love I feel is so fundamentally different than anything else I have experienced. It is something that I pray you get to feel in your lifetime, though I expect it won’t happen until you are in my shoes.

As we grow together in our father-son relationship, there are things that I wish to pass on to you. Many of these things won’t make sense until you’re much older, but I hope that you will take them in and make them a part of yourself long before you understand them.

1. Love your God. If nothing else, know and love the God that has already given you the Grace of his love, forgiveness, and understanding. When you know God, accept his Holy Spirit, and rest in the peace that comes with this acceptance, life is so much easier. You are able to count on the one person who will never fail you to carry you through anything that life throws at you. I came to understand Grace and Mercy much later in life than I would wish for you and I hope that I can help guide you in your spiritual journey.

2. Love yourself. It is too easy to let the lies of the world bring you down. There are too many people out there that only know how to make themselves feel better by making others feel worse. There are always going to be people who will tell you that you’re not good enough. But know in your heart that you are. Knowing your God and the perfect love and acceptance he has for you will help you to love and accept yourself. With this, you can accomplish whatever you set your mind to.

3. Be a gentleman. By the time you are old enough for this to start making an impact in your life (probably the first time you notice that cute girl in class), being a “gentleman” will likely be way out of fashion. It supposedly was when I was a teenager. But believe me when I say that it never went out of fashion and never will. Manners and kindness are always appreciated, display your intelligence and maturity, and will never be something you’ll regret after the fact. And while you will likely see that you will be treated better by people if you treat them well, you’ll find that simply being gentlemanly is rewarding in and of itself.

4. Respect and loyalty are earned. This was a lesson that I learned the hard way, through many trips and stumbles in life. Just because people hold certain positions in your life does not mean that they automatically deserve your respect and loyalty. This includes people in authority, teachers, your girlfriend, and yes, even your parents. All relationships, whether familial, romantic, or friendly, require an equal give and take on both sides. Because you are a man of God, because you love and respect yourself, and because you are a gentleman and an example for others, your respect and loyalty are highly desired and should be earned, not given away freely.

5. Be your own man. Even though this means that you may disregard everything I’ve said above, it’s still something I want for you. Your mother and I, the rest of our family, your friends and teachers, even random strangers will tell you how you should act, what you should think, and who you should be. I certainly advise you to take in everything people say, but analyze it and make your own decisions that are right for you.

Whatever you do in life, you will be loved, first and foremost by God, and followed closely by your mother and me. You do not have to earn our love and loyalty; we will always be your biggest supporters.

I’m looking forward to seeing the man that you’ll grow into, but I love watching you just be the little man you are today.

Love,
Your Dad